Not being able to get pregnant was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to go through and I didn’t expect to feel as if there was something fundamentally wrong with me.
After two years of trying, I looked at other women with jealousy and even though I was supportive of others getting pregnant, I was very sad for myself. It was a painful journey.
But it was a journey of self-discovery the least.
If you too feel sad every time your period arrives, or dread friends and family pregnancy announcements, you might have built walls around you, but on the inside, you feel lonely and vulnerable.
Another frustrating part of this journey is that most people don’t understand what you are going through and even those closest to you, often don’t know how to act around you or what to say.
I personally lived in my own world of tension and anxiety for years, trying to do everything right and losing myself in the process of it.
Most of us often say that The only thing that would make us happy is having a child and we tell ourselves that we need to be strong, keep on going and trying to do our best.
Because there are so many thoughts and emotions to deal with, we don’t usually allow enough time for ourselves to process these thoughts and emotions. There is a sense of pressure and we distract ourselves from ourselves, sometimes without releasing it and sometimes it is a way of coping for us.
It has been finally recognized that those couples that struggle with fertility need emotional support. I have been saying this for many years.
Our thoughts and emotions play a bigger and much more important role in this process than tracking the correct day to have sex.
Even during activities such as yoga you might be able to connect to your body and relax your mind, but if you are disconnected from your body for the rest of the day and mostly living in your head that’s consumed by thoughts about getting pregnant – the benefits of yoga on your fertility are very small.
If you use alternative treatments or you’re going through assisted conception and you drag yourself out of bed each morning with a sense of dread, you are not addressing the things that matter and affect your body during this process.
The most important thing you have to address is your inner state, whether you’re trying naturally or going through treatments.
I’m not suggesting that you use positive thinking and pretend that everything is ok! Your pain and your thoughts are valid and completely understandable!
Processing our pain is what creates balance, healing, and letting go, and allowing.
We can’t think our way out of a bad feeling, but clearing your mind and replacing your thoughts is where we should begin.
Instead of waiting to get pregnant to feel better, you have to feel better so that you have a bigger chance to get pregnant.
Without any self-judgment and blame, notice thoughts like:
I’m never going to get pregnant, I’m too old, I can’t imagine not being able to have children. Why me? What’s wrong with my body?
Your brain produces these thoughts as a result of pain. Don’t resist these thoughts or the pain. The key to this is recognizing those thoughts and emotions and with self-compassion finding thoughts that are slightly better.
Monitor your Thoughts about Fertility?
Monitor the thoughts that you have about fertility, your body and what you believe to be true for you. Bring these thoughts to surface, acknowledge them and then try replacing these thoughts with other more positive thoughts. Even if they feel untrue to you at the beginning.
Write all of your thoughts down every day and notice how many of those thoughts are repetitive. Notice how much time of your day you spend thinking thoughts like, this is never going to happen, how did she do it? Why is it not happening? I feel so worried!
As a result, you’ll feel better and your body will reflect the change in your thinking through perhaps ovulating again, getting more regular periods, or healing your condition. Your thoughts help you heal your body.
I have so many things to help you with this if you’d like to support your chances and create a healthy pregnancy.
I have a free E-Book and a free Mind Quietening audio where you can begin to clear your mind and let go of those painful emotions that don’ts serve you anymore.
I also have Beautiful affirmations that you can listen to daily Free Here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XBBgpgsU0KQ
You can find all the links just below,
Download it here: https://martinapangrazzi.co.uk/teach-your-body-how-to-get-pregnant/
You can watch my video titled How to change negative thinking https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Pi0hH8Bphk
Mind Quietening Audio Here: https://martinapangrazzi.co.uk/meditation-to-switch-off-the-mind-free/
Love courage
Martina
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