Increase Your Fertility at ANY age learning this one thing!
Can I be honest with you? In all these years working with couples that want to increase their fertility, there are many identical beliefs that they hold on to. They suffer deep emotional pain as they get more and more worried each month. They often lose their confidence not only in themselves but in their bodies ’ability to create a new life. They feel disconnected from the world around them but they become experts in how to detect ovulation signs, what to eat, when and how to have sex, how age, environment and stress affect their fertility. The thing is none of these beliefs are helping them. In fact, it’s hindering their efforts and they don’t even realize it.
Let me explain.
Let’s say you’re someone in their 30’s or 40’s and you’ve done your research about how age reduces your fertility.
The facts are clear and undeniable. At birth, women have around 2000 000 eggs and by the time we are teenagers we only have around 400 000. As we approach our 30’s much more eggs are ‘lost’ each day and their quality declines as well as we get older. Male fertility decreases with age also, although to a much lesser degree.
What’s shocking to many of my clients is when I explain to them that we need to ignore these facts to increase our fertility. Yep. Just like that, I’m asking you to ignore them. The reason for this is that these types of information are the main topic in the infertility world and your mind creates a negative talk which goes like this: I’m too old, It’s hard to conceive at my age, This is not going to be easy due to my age. You end up listening to other people’s stories about how difficult it has been for them. You doubt your ability to conceive. You believe it’s hard.
Guess what this information does to your brain and your body. You take on these beliefs as truths and your brain believes you. Your body responds accordingly to your beliefs. You are not increasing your chances of getting pregnant. Your beliefs determine how your body will respond. As time goes on, you aren’t only concerned about your age, but you begin to question your existence on this earth. Your fear about your age turns into insecurity, anxiety and worry. You start thinking whether this will ever happen for you.
This state of powerlessness brings up other emotions like feeling insignificant, useless, jealous, or even angry. You increase your efforts and try even harder, work even harder, study more, do more, think more and feel completely out of control and in despair every time your period arrives.
A small adjustment in your beliefs can make a huge difference in the way your body is responding. Your body is a powerful machine that can support you. How are you supporting your body? You are not giving it any chance by believing that it’s somehow broken because of your age. You are not believing in its ability to create a new life. Your body is closely listening to what you are thinking and believing to be true and it responds. It responds to the beliefs you have. Whether what you believe is a known fact, you don’t have to believe that it is true for you.
Let me explain further because if you are still reading this you are probably wondering how this can be true.
The bigger factor than your age is your mind. Your mind changes your brain and everything you hear and believe to be true changes your brain. If you read about how age affects your fertility and believe that to be true for you, you are causing changes in your brain.
“Just like muscles, regions of the brain grow thicker as we use them – as we repeat the same movement, imagine the same thing, ponder the same thought or idea, feel the same feeling over and over again, just as muscles grow as we repeatedly perform an exercise.” (p. 51, How your Mind can Heal your Body, David R. Hamilton PhD.)
In other words, what I’ve seen happening to me and my clients over and over again was that as soon as they shifted their thinking, their bodies responded as well. No matter your age, your belief is what matters. If you believe you’re too old to get pregnant you are changing your brain and the way your body responds to your belief. If you are thinking that your body isn’t working properly because of your age, that you don’t have enough eggs, that getting pregnant is hard, your body is responding to your beliefs. Whether they are a fact or not your belief in them makes it true for you.
Whenever I start working with someone who for whatever reason aren’t able to get pregnant, I get them to write down what they have read, heard about fertility that research has shown and then I get them to think about what they would rather believe. If you tell yourself every day that your leg hurts for a certain period of time well guess what, your leg will start hurting! Your brain can’t even tell the difference. It responds to what you believe. If you are telling yourself that you are too old, then your body will respond appropriately.
Today, begin with choosing new beliefs that will create a more fertile body for you. Who cares what the research shows right? If you can believe that it doesn’t have to be true for you, you are practically finally in control of something! You are in control of what you are thinking and believing – which affects your fertility.
Get a pen and paper and write down what your beliefs are.
Here are some examples that my clients wrote:
I still have thousands of healthy eggs
I still am able to conceive until I reach menopause
Many women in my age conceived healthy children
My body is working properly
I love my body
I appreciate how my body responds to my thoughts
I can imagine myself pregnant
I can imagine having a baby
Getting pregnant doesn’t have to be hard
I nurture my body with my thoughts and my body responds to my thoughts
Make these statements your mantras. If you get annoyed and frustrated because at the back of your mind you don’t believe what you are saying, it is only because you’ve spent so long believing things about yourself that are hindering your fertility that your brain will fight against new positive suggestions. Your mind loves drama and negativity but it will eventually adapt and take on your new ways of thinking. This is the part where you have control. You can control your mind and therefore your fertility. Choose your own beliefs and take your power back at least in this way. It is possible and it can change your biochemistry. It can change how your body responds. You can be one of those people that ignored what everyone else says and created in their mind what they wanted to feel in their bodies. See yourself as fertile and your body will show you how you are in charge.
Perseverance is key. You have to make your new beliefs stick and they have to feel as they are true to you. Sit with your new beliefs and repeat them to yourself daily. Disregard beliefs that don’t serve your body. Be consistent and improve your fertility.
Lots of love