I remember suggesting to a friend, Debbie, the reason why she had probably become pregnant after trying for almost six years. Her eyes popped out of her head when I told her that she likely got pregnant because deep inside she’d accepted that she had no control over her fertility. She had started to come to the realization that she’d probably never have children. She and her husband had a savings account that was specifically for the baby they so desperately wanted. Thinking the baby would never arrive, they relaxed and spent all that money on a new car.
Debs got pregnant not long after. “I guess I never thought about it that way,” she said when we spoke. “But I have to admit that there is something to it.”
I’m guessing you have heard many tales similar to Debbie’s. Your opinion may be that “It’s just one of those things” that happens all the time: couples stop trying and suddenly, miraculously they conceive. May be an “infertile” colleague adopted two children, and then a few years later miraculously had her own child out of the blue. Whatever your experience, what if something within you has the power to change your life? Something remarkable that you can’t explain, but you have a feeling that it does exist? You might call it God, fate or some bigger power, something that you know is bigger than you. Something or someone that rules the world.
Martina Pangrazzi
Soooooooo true. We are trying for our second through ivf and my consultant has said this numerous times. We’re not at the “give up accepted fate”. I so want to be there only so that we’ll somehow conceive. Sounds daft doesn’t it? You’re right though in your last paragraph. It’ll happen when it’s meant to be. When God intends. (Or nature, the universe etc etc :))
Thank you for your comment. When I write about these things I always try to help others and share my experiences and knowledge. However, I find that whatever helps one person doesn’t do anything for the other and somehow even when I think that I have the exact solution – unfortunately it isn’t a solution for everyone. It’s like we’re on the same path but need to get to the end all by ourselves, in our own time. For me, it was the acceptance of the fact that I was obsessive and desperate to get pregnant, I wouldn’t let go and let the nature take over. I wanted to be in charge. I guess we just have to follow our gut and try to follow that positive path. There isn’t anything good or bad, but an open mind is a huge advantage I think. Good luck, fingers crossed !